The beginning of the end.

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You’ve probably noticed that this blog is on the wane. Don’t worry, we’re fine! Better than fine actually, and that’s the thing I suppose. I’ve reached a point where I no longer wrangle constantly with parenting issues, no longer find the same need to write, in order to piece together and order my feelings on the things I’m finding difficult or care passionately about. We’re just… living.

One of my favourite bloggers, Esther Coren of Recipe Rifle (do check her out, she’s hilarous and soul affirming and tells it exactly like it is), recently wrote on her bringing her blog to a close, and said it far better than I ever could…

“I was traumatised by my children when they were very small – and doubly traumatised when they were both really small, at the same time. It produced huge questions to which I sought the answers from other people, and from inside my own head.

But life now is so prosaic, we just bumble along. And I’ve completely let go. I don’t twist myself up in knots about anything much these days… We can do the things we can do and we can’t do the things we can’t do. And soon we’ll be able to do whatever we want.

It’s not that I’ve answered all the questions, it’s that I know now for certain that there aren’t any answers.”

Quite.

I made a decision a while back that I would take the blog up until October, when my boys turn 2 and 4. The monthly updates, while some of the least popular posts in terms of readership, form the backbone of why I write here – to record and to remember. I want to see that through.

But like all jobs I guess, once you know the end is in sight, your enthusiasm begins to dwindle, and so here I am writing very little of anything, which is a shame and not my intention. I would like to go out strong, rather than fading away into the abyss of abandoned blogs. I have around 5 months left until I hit the log out button for good, and begin the process of making my posts in little books (does anyone know of a company that’s good for that by the way? Making WordPress blogs into books?), so I figure I have 5 good posts left in me, an overview of sorts, of what I’ve learned here over the last four years.

I hope you’ll stick around for them, see this thing through with me, but I wanted you to know why there’s not been much action here of late, and that there is an end, but that this is just the beginning of it.

2 thoughts on “The beginning of the end.

  1. I’m feeling a bit this way myself too. The older they get, the less there is to say, for better or worse (mostly for better though). I don’t think I will stop altogether, but I definitely feel myself slowing down. Yet another thing to feel bittersweet about. I hope you don’t disappear entirely though!

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